Chapter 25 – Rejection, and After That
I cannot think of anything.
What, what have I done. What in the world did I say that it incurred Wilhelm-sama’s anger?
My tears would not stop, but I am unable to look down. All that I could do was to look towards the door where Wilhelm-sama left.
I was rejected by, Wilhelm-sama.
「Wil, helm, sama……aaaa………!!」
As long as I am by Wilhelm-sama’s side, that was enough for me.
I am content, just being together with Wilhelm-sama.
I have completely thought that, Wilhelm-sama would accept my love for sure.
「O-Ojou-sama, please get a hold of yourself. The words from earlier, the must be not Wilhelm-sama’s true feelings!」
「Wilhelm-sama, he adores Ojou-sama! There is no mistaking that! I-I am sure that Wilhelm-sama has some kind of reason!」
I could not muster strength, my knees fell to the ground, and covered my face with my hands.
Why, why did it go wrong.
Do I, not have the qualifications to walk beside Wilhelm-sama?
He is the only Wilhelm-sama for me.
If Wilhelm-sama abandons me, I do not want to live in this world anymore.
Wilhelm-sama is my everything.
My everything is Wilhelm-sama.
“Why, why”, I asked many times, but the answer would not come out.
But, instead, weeps were all that would come out from my throat.
Even if I cover my face, my tears pass through.
All that was there, was my heart filled with despair.
「Ojou-sama! Let’s return for today! Let’s come again tomorrow……no, e〜to, the next day after that! If so, I am sure that Wilhelm-sama would apologize as well!」
「I-I was told……uu……not come, anymore……」
「That is not true at all! This Natalia shall swear! I pledge that Ojou-sama and Wilhelm-sama shall be together!」
My hands, they left my face.
My vision is blurry, I cannot see anything. Because of the tears that have flowed, I cannot tell anything at all.
But, even so.
I understood that, it is Natalia’s warmth, embracing me.
「Ojou-sama, please do not do anything rash! Please, please believe Wilhelm-sama!」
How, it is, that I would believe Wilhelm-sama.
Wilhelm-sama, he said.
He said that he is a person who cannot take care of his family, and cannot take care of his wife.
That is why he told me to find a partner suitable for myself.
He told me to go home.
I have never seen, I have never seen Wilhelm-sama that angry.
He was angry with me.
I have never been shouted at like that ever.
It means that, Wilhelm-sama’s anger is just that huge.
「Y-Yes! Ojou-sama! Natalia is here!」
If Wilhelm-sama hates me, then there is no reason for me to live anymore.
A life that I cannot spend with Wilhelm-sama, is not needed.
That is why.
I will, die.
「Ojou-sama! Please keep yourself together! Please do not lose your heart!」
「Ku……! Ojou-sama, let’s return to the mansion first! I will report this to Elizabeth-sama! This Natalia, she will never forgive Wilhelm-sama’s such recklessness!」
Natalia, she also seems angry, and stared towards the door.
It is true, Wilhelm-sama told me to go home.
That means, there is no longer reason for me to stay in the order of knights.
If so, I need to return to the mansion.
I was told, I should not bring lunch tomorrow.
Then, what about the day after that?
And the next day after that?
Is it that, I will never be able to bring lunch to Wilhelm-sama, forever?
If I returned today.
Will my connection with Wilhelm-sama, disappear?
The door in front of us opened without warning.
For an instant, a hope was born in my heart.
I thought, Wilhelm-sama might have returned.
I thought that, he does not hate me.
「Ouchh……really, is that woman there a monster……oh, oh? Oi, why are you crying?」
The one standing there.
Was a red hair, who did not read the air.
「Tch……what an insensible man」
「Ha? Eh? What? What just happened?」
「Ojou-sama is busy. Please leave at once」
「No, please leave you say, this is the garrison of the order of knights you know? Shouldn’t it be you guys who should leave?」
Because there was hope that was born, I fell deeper into despair.
Even Zack’s cheerfulness only felt unpleasant right now.
I cried, cried, and cried till my tears were dried.
As I rubbed my eyelids that must have become ugly because of being swollen.
Slowly, I stood up.
「……Natalia, let’s go home」
「Zack……please forgive us. Please do not, mind me」
「Ha? N-No, I mean, why are you crying? I’ll listen if you want」
「It is okay. I am about to return right now」
I acted firmly against Zack.
A lady must never cry in front of a man who is not their partner. If a lady must cry, she should cry alone in her room.
And, I cannot explain the circumstances to Zack. Because I sure that just explaining it, will bring me to tears.
「Is something wrong?」
「Just wait a minute. I’ll send you off」
「It is fine. Zack must have his duties in the order of knights」
「There’s still time in my break. Your house, it hasn’t changed places right? If so, I’ll still make it on time after sending to there and returning」
Saying that, Zack went outside without waiting for my reply.
I am sure, he went out to submit a request to go out.
I never ask him to do that too, how intruding.
Zack returned quickly, “This way”, he said, and we walked side by side to the entrance.
I did not want to show my red eyes and swollen eyelids, so I walked looking down from start to end.
「Ah, Gyle-san. I’ll leave for a bit, so. I submitted the request so it’s alright」
「Zack? A-re? Oi, you……」
「We were friends from childhood. I’ll just send her off, I’ll return quickly」
Seen off by Gyle-sama in the reception, we left the garrison of the order of knights.
This must be the last time, that I will visit this place.
However, Zack would continuously talk to me who does not utter a word.
「Come to think of it, my little sister, well, she got a bit deflowered but, well, she was found relatively fine. There’s the Silver Deer Diner right? She’s working there right now」
Those words of Zack, they do not enter my ears.
Only the words of Wilhelm-sama’s rejection repeated many times in my mind.
「I mean, I thought that working in the order of knights isn’t bad, but actually, it’s quite difficult. All that we do is training, and it is more difficult if Captain’s around. Well, though, it’s fulfilling everyday」
Hearing the word “Captain”, I flinched in reaction.
I long for him so much, that I would overreact to such words.
Why, why did you reject me, Wilhelm-sama.
And while Zack was talking by himself like that, we finally reached the mansion.
I felt like I have something scheduled for the afternoon, but I could not think of that. All that I wanted to do right now, is to rest.
“I should at least say thanks”, I raised my head, and looked at Zack.
And then, Zack asks while he narrowed his eyebrows.
「You……do you like, Captain Wilhelm?」
That is right.